Poetry (gasp!)

So, I decided I wanted to do something a bit different today. I thought I'd share some poetry. Now, I am by no means a great poet, but I do enjoy expressing myself through poetry. It's a different outlet. It allows me to create unique visions and emotions that are all subjective. I love subjectivity when it comes to art. Now, some of these are quite old, some are more recent (you'll notice a drastic change in my writing voice. At least I do! LOL). So, it may not be the best you've ever read, but enjoy it nonetheless! :)



Vulnerable
Cut Open
Exsanguination
Intestines dangling
Heart exposed
For all the world to see
Open
Weak
Bloody
I am
Vulnerable.





Home
Crimson red
Cheerful orange
Tranquil beige
Breath-taking green
Blissful circles
Serene lines
Golden reflections
Untouched
Saved just for me
You are my
Home






Black
Sheets of blackness race down my breast.
The darkness is everywhere, it is building up.
Building up.
Lonliness envelops me, as I find my way through the hair and blackness.
I am bald for them now.
None will ever notice.
No one sees me.
I am bald, though. For him, for her, for her, for her, for him...
If they are fortunate, they will see me in my baldness.
If not, it is only hair, it will grow back.
I yearn for your arms to be around me.
For you to hold me.
Hold me.
I do not understand how you can love someone and never tell them.
I do not understand how you can make your love bleed and not be wounded yourself.
I do not understand how a little dye under the skin can release endorphins, and raise
self-love.
I do not understand.
That is why I live in silence.






Suddenly
Suddenly every sound is an instrument in the beautiful symphony of life that is all around me.
Suddenly colors are so bold and bright they are blinding, yet I could stare at them endlessly.
Suddenly, I am weak and light-headed, yet I've never been stronger.
Suddenly, I am overwhelmed with a joyous fear.
Suddenly, all the pieces of my life fit, and I know they will not come unglued.
Suddenly, the sun seems dull comparitive to the brightness I have.
Suddenly, the moon is full, and she will never wane again.
Suddenly, I feel no pain, I can go on indefinetly.
Suddenly, for the first time in my life, I know what true happiness is.





Goodbye
How do we say goodbye to a bright, beautiful, but fleeting sunset? The bold colors blinding us one minute, vanish the next. How do we say goodbye to something we cannot grasp?
How do we say goodbye to a world that moves so quickly, our voices blend in with the blur of life and are forgotten? Can you say goodbye to the wind?
How do we say goodbye when we can hardly say hello? We build giant, impenetrable walls to protect ourselves, yet they only end up hurting us more.
How do we say goodbye when memories are nothing more than pictures with slight warps, holes and deformities in them? They slowly fade further and further, making us squint, trying to see that beautiful image that is lost somewhere in time.
How do we say goodbye to that which we cannot see? As humans, we foolishly only believe in the obtainable, what we can see, hear or touch. Yet, there is so much more that goes on around us, and we lose something great if we do not take the time to see what is invisible.
How do we say goodbye to that which we do not understand? What we see around us is so much greater than our puny minds could ever conceive, and for us to hold it for that moment to whisper "Goodbye...." in an ear that is so much bigger than even a child's imagination.
How do we say goodbye to a piece of ourselves? If we are with ourselves all the time, carry each part of us infinitely, how is possible that we lose ourselves so quickly? How can we let go of that which bears an effect on our soul?
How do we say goodbye and let go of souls that are intertwined with us and still carry on as if we never knew them? How does life continue without these souls? It is never the same. Their beauty, love, life, light is gone. Their energy has swirled, and danced, and moved, and morphed. Their impact on life has changed.
How do we say goodbye to emotions?
How do we just say goodbye?
How do I say goodbye to you, and just continue to walk on?





The Road with No Destination
White shadows consuming me
Light insurmountable
Surrounded by silence
Blackness enveloping me
Hollow are ny
Ears
Eyes
Voice
Spirit
As I wander
The road that leads to no destination





Words Unspoken
Compassion
Comfort
Gentleness
Light
Unconditional love
Joy
Fulfillment
Understanding through
Words
Unspoken

Why Do I Write?

I think it is a safe assumption that we have all wondered why certain people choose certain career paths.



So, thus it is not uncommon that I have been asked, "Why do you write?"

Why do I write? Good question!


Well, I write because I just do. Ok, that was a crappy answer. But it is partially true. Just as every person has thing(s) that come naturally to them (and thus they are naturally inclined to do such activities), I'm inclined to write because it's just in my nature.

I also write because expressing myself through words in poetry, creating characters and stories has always been my outlet for self-expression. I can release my anger, let out my tears, scream in total silence and create my ultimate utopia or live in my darkest fears. It helps me to escape. It helps me to move forward when I experience a trauma or heart break. Writing brings me to my zen place.


As I said in yesterday's blog, my characters are all a reflection of me in someway (some in ways I didn't even describe yesterday). So, writing helps me to understand myself. It helps me to grow and improve as a person. It makes me a better me.

I try to write in as many genres/styles/formats as I can. I think it's important to continually push myself, pursue new things and see all the various ways that words can paint a picture. I am by no means a good poet, but I still write poetry. I have NOTHING on Emily Dickinson.
But that doesn't mean I shouldn't write poetry.

I'd love to think of my books as artistic creations that will stand the test of time like the Pyramids, but they're not.

The truth is, my novels are contemporary fiction. They are my creations. Do I view them as art? I view them as self-expression. Self-expression can be just that, or it can in fact be art. I'll let you decide that one. Regardless, my books are my statements to the world whether they are read by one person or a million. They reflect my experiences, my opinions. I highly doubt they'll change the world, but I am still letting my voice be heard in some way.


So, why do I continue to write poetry, novels, short stories, blogs, and more? Because I can. Because I am honored to hold the title of "scribe, story teller, writer."
(That's Thoth, the Ancient Egyptian God of Scribes) ;)